You deserve a guide that knows the terrain

I’ve coached and guided hundreds of people toward growth, connection, and aliveness — you can get there too.

They say the darkest hour is right before the dawn

More than twenty years ago I was at a low point. A relationship had dissolved and left me questioning everything I thought I knew. I was despondent and had to admit that for the first time in my life, I desperately needed help.

Over the following years, I found guides, allies, and helpers. I built community, got a therapist, started going to men’s groups and meditation retreats, and commenced my own healing process in earnest.

I found the ways my personal and cultural traumas had cut me off from my own aliveness and vulnerability. I leaned in and took risks.

Then I committed myself to giving back so much of what I had learned. I’m not perfect or “healed” but I’m ready to help you navigate life’s complexities.

Hi, I’m Alexander

A potent blend of art, nature, and ceremony allows the people I work with to unblock their innate drive toward healing.

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I was a DJ and a photographer for many years before finding this path. I had a lot of fun, but I felt like something was missing. And that something was DEPTH.

When I started my own healing journey, I found that depth. Then, in working with expanded states more intentionally, I found the fullest expression of that depth.

More than 15 years ago I received my Master’s in Counseling Psychology with a focus on Expressive Arts. I became a licensed psychotherapist and attended TONS of additional trainings — Hakomi, Ecotherapy, Brainspotting, MAPS for MDMA, Polaris for Ketamine, EFT for Couples, PACT, TCT, AEDP, and many other acronyms too.

But working with me now is not psychotherapy — it’s something different and it allows me to be more flexible, creative, and personal with my approach.

What you can expect

Professionalism

We get clear on costs, meeting times and location, duration, and scope of the work in advance.

A tailored program

You’re unique and so are your concerns. Let’s collaborate on a process just for you.

An openness to mystery

We are all participating in something much, much bigger than us. Call that thing Nature, Life, Love, God, The Universe, The Tao, or The Force, it doesn’t matter. But honoring this opens the door to so much growth.

An honoring of differences

I’m committed to understanding diverse viewpoints and experiences. I won’t always get it right, but I bring myself wholeheartedly to the process and get consultation from mentors regularly.

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    "Before working with Alexander, I spent years making minimal progress.

    From our first session he knew when to listen, when to support, and when to push back. My life has improved immeasurably through our work together, and I recommend him without reservation."

    -Jens

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    "Working with Alexander has been so helpful.

    Both individually and in groups, I feel able to explore transformative experiences, but (crucially!) I always feel safe. I feel less depressed than I used to, and I know my work with Alexander has been a big part of that."

    -Dan

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    "We were stuck in the same old patterns that kept hurting us both until our sessions with Alexander showed us a better way.

    Alexander helped us dig up those buried wounds we'd been carrying around and finally start healing them together. Now we've built new ways of being together that actually work, and our relationship feels fresh and real again."

    -L&R

  • "My experience in working with Alexander has been one of feeling safe, seen, and understood.

    Alexander creates a container in which I can surrender fully to the experience. He guides me in ways in which I have found profound - both inwardly and outwardly.”

    -Ryan

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    “Alexander has been an invaluable guide in our journey, offering deep empathy and unwavering support.

    His innovative treatment strategies have helped us navigate challenges in ways we never imagined, fostering growth and understanding in our relationship. With his exceptional experience, he creates a safe and constructive space for meaningful communication and healing. We are incredibly grateful for his insight and expertise.” 

    -J & V

  • "I can genuinely say that the work I've done with Alex has been the most important work of my life.

    There is no one I'd recommend more highly as a coach or guide than Alex, in fact I've already done so many times! Not only is Alex experienced, compassionate and wise, but he has always embodied integrity, creativity and a strong intuition in our work together.”

    -Tyler M.

  • "After almost four years our family is back together. Alex played an important role in our healing and I am so grateful.”

    -ST

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    "I have been to a number of retreats now. Yours are by far the best. Seriously."

    -Stefan

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    "After the death of our 19 year old son we feared we would be disconnected and lost in grief forever.

    Alexander helped us feel seen and safe to share the darkest parts of our broken selves and heal together."

    -Sean & Jessica

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    "Sitting in a Men’s Group with Alexander Warnow was an incredibly enriching experience.

    Alexander brings a genuine warmth and wisdom that makes every conversation feel deeply personal and meaningful, creating a space where vulnerability, authenticity, and growth are welcomed. His presence as a facilitator helped ground the group and fostered a sense of community and connection that I still carry with me today, and I’m sure I will continue to do so, long after our time together."

    -Seth

  • “I’ve seen countless therapists over the years, they all just sat back and listened to me bitch about my life, which was what I thought therapy was all about.

    Then I was fortunate to connect with Alexander. He is the first counselor I’ve worked with who listens to me. He makes me stop and evaluate what’s going on at that moment, versus my just dropping emotional bombs like they’re just the facts and unimportant, feel how these things feel, and then talk about them rawly. My time with him is helping me understand who I am, and who I want to be, for the first time in my 56 years. I am thankful for all he’s helped me with, even though it’s been really, really hard, but so very worth it.”

    TVB

Let’s work together

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1:1 COACHING & GUIDING

Let’s get you unstuck so you can connect with the beauty that naturally resides inside you - then you can freely give your gifts to the world.

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RELATIONSHIP COACHING

With conscious attention, you can learn to work as a team to remove the blocks to connection so you have a loving, nourishing partnership.

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GROUP WORK

Families, bachelor parties, men’s groups, and progressive organizations can all deepen their connection and sense of purpose by consciously choosing to engage in healing practices.

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MENTORSHIP & CONSULTATION

Deepen your capacity to be of service by refining your skills and reflecting on your clients.

values that guide my work

What’s important to me

Authenticity

I’m curious what you really think and feel (and I’ll let you know what I really think and feel). This genuine human connection forms the bedrock for the rest of the work we do.

Creativity

Creativity is not just about making art - though that can be very helpful — it’s about finding creative solutions out of your difficult quagmires.

Humility

Coming from a place of humility allows you to ask for guidance. It attracts the help you need. As Rumi wrote, “Cry out in your weakness, all medicine wants is pain to cure.”

Honoring the mystery

Something is going on beyond what you can see, touch and quantify. If you are curious about how to access that it starts to reveal itself to you.

Reciprocity

When we give back we honor our interconnection with all of life — the human and the more than human — and we start to deeply feel the nourishing connection available to each and every one of us. Reciprocity is why I donate to The Drug Policy Alliance and the Indigenous Medicine Fund.

If you’re feeling cut off from the flow of life the temptation can be to try to take something, get something, or extract something from the world. But you may find that a focus on giving first is the key that unlocks a deeper aliveness.

Get to know me

What I get up to when I’m not working

Man sitting in a wicker chair with a black dog, candle on table, colorful wall hanging, and a cactus plant in the background.

I have the sweetest dog named Shadow

According to DNA tests he is 38% pit bull, 17% Pekingese, 9% German Shepherd, 8% Boxer - and 100% love! He has been by my side for more than five years now, and many people find his affectionate and calm presence to be of benefit in their work with me. Note that Shadow’s presence in our work is optional but recommended. ;-)

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I love nature

I live in the Sierra Foothills and I hike most days, spending time with trees, waterfalls, and rivers. These experiences nourish and astonish me on a deep level.

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I write poetry — sometimes with my typewriter

I love poetry — it allows me to touch on liminal spaces. Occasionally, I’ll take my typewriter to a public space — a town square, or a festival — and write on-the-spot poems for people. If you’d like to see some of these poems check out my poetry Instagram.

Podcast appearances